"Come Play Wiz Me" is the 60th episode of Desperate Housewives.
Mike meets his new lawyer, Alan Marcus. Mike could get 10 years in prison--5 for good behavior. Susan isn't happy with Alan. Jane's (Ian's wife) condition takes a turn for the worse--she is not responding to her medication. Ian goes on a business trip to Montreal. He calls Susan from Montreal and tells her he got a call from the doctor about Jane's condition. He is coming home early, as he fears Jane is dying. He asks Susan to go to the hospital, as he doesn't want Jane to be alone if she dies before he gets home. Susan finds a woman in Jane's room who is kicking a man out. Her name is Erika Gold, and she is Jane's best friend. Susan tells her she's Ian's girlfriend, and Erika invites her in. Susan asks about the man she kicked out, and she said his name is Ted, and Jane cheated with him 5 years ago. Ian found out. He took her back, but they went through marital problems. Later, Jane's blood pressure drops and she is expected to die before the end of the day. Ian calls Susan from the plane on the way back to Fairview, and Susan tells him she doesn't think Jane will be alive when he comes back. Susan puts the phone up to Jane's ear, and Ian says goodbye. At the end of the episode, we see Jane's corpse being wheeled out of her room, and into the morgue.
Mike confronts Paul about paying his attacker. Paul tells him the truth about their history, and that Zach is his biological son. Zach pays for Mike's bail, as Gabrielle asked him to. Mike comes home, and finds Zach on his doorstep. He thanks Zach, and Zach tells him that if there's anything else he needs, just let him know. He asks Zach to visit Paul, for Paul wants to see him again and he never stopped loving him. Zach visits Paul, and Paul asks him a favor; to give him money so he can hire someone to track down Felicia. Zach refuses and walks away, as he wants to marry Gabrielle and he wants to spend all his money on her.
After an 8-week leave of absence from work due to her gunshot wound, Lynette is finally returning. As she is ready to leave, Tom tells her his manager, Ken, quit and he needs someone to accompany him to a street fair. Tom talks Lynette into helping him, and Lynette avoids work by going out to her front yard where her boss, Ed, and his assistant, Jerry, are waiting, and putting her cast back on and pretending to be miserable. When Ed touches her in the shoulder, she screams in pretend pain, and takes out her painkiller pills, but accidentally-on-purpose drops them all over the place. Ed and Jerry decide to leave her home for another week, and Lynette goes with Tom to the street fair, where their pizza proves to be popular. All the kids except Kayla are there. Mrs. McCluskey is babysitting her. The doorbell rings, and it is Ed, dropping by a gift basket for Lynette. Mrs. McCluskey goes along with the lie and tells him she's at a doctor appointment, but Kayla, continuing to hate Lynette, tells him the truth. Ed goes to the street fair and fires Lynette, but Lynette begs and pleads and Ed decides to give her another chance. Lynette eventually changes her mind and quits her job to help Tom run the pizzeria.
Bree confronts Orson about the teeth she found in Alma's closet. Orson calls Gloria and tells her he knows about what she's planning with Alma, and he wants her to stop. Gloria comes to Bree's house and tells her that she thinks Orson and Alma belong together, and she's standing in the way of them. Bree doesn't listen to her and sprays water on her feet. Orson goes to Alma's house to confront her, and finds Alma lying in her bedroom, almost dead. Gloria is watching over Alma, who committed suicide due to depression about Orson not loving her. Gloria offers Orson a drink, but the drink is full of drugs, which knocks him out. Alma actually hasn't cut her wrists open--she opens her eyes and pushes Orson onto her bed. Gloria leaves to give them some privacy. Alma put two drugs in the drink; one was sleeping pills, and the other was viagra. Alma tells Orson before he falls asleep that she has been injecting herself with hormones to help her get pregnant with his baby. She rapes him. Bree comes home from her book club, and Andrew tells her that Orson is at Alma's house. Bree sees only a bedroom light on in Alma's house. She finds Orson and Alma in bed, and discovers the drugs she gave him. Bree punches Alma in the face, calls Andrew, and tells him to bring a wheelbarrow.
The Snowflake Beauty Pageant takes place, and Sheri Maltby, one of Gabrielle and Vern's students, wins. But it turns out that Zach bribed the judges. He begs Gabrielle to go out on a date with him, but she refuses. He continues to try to bribe her with gifts. When Susan learns that Zach is rich, she begs Gabrielle to get Zach to pay for Mike's bail. Gabrielle visits his home and asks him to. He agrees, as long as they can go out to 3 meals, all with dessert, a whole day with activities of his choice, and a goodnight kiss. Gabrielle actually has fun on her date, but the kiss doesn't go so well. Gabrielle learns that Zach paid other women to kiss him, and he also paid a band to hang out with him. Gabrielle promises her friendship--a friendly one, not a romantic one. She sends him flowers.
- Edie Britt (Nicollette Sheridan) and Carlos Solis (Ricardo Antonio Chavira) have no speaking lines.
- This episode attracted 17.08 million viewers in its original US airing.
- Valerie Mahaffey chose this episode for consideration in the category of "Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series" at the 2007 Emmy Awards.
- The episode title, Come Play Wiz Me is a song taken from the Stephen Sondheim musical, Anyone Can Whistle.