"Distant Past" is the 78th episode of the Desperate Housewives.
Gabrielle visits a church to see Carlos. She doesn’t want to meet him right now. He wants to go to the police, and she doesn’t. They agree to stick to her plan. She reminds him Victor would have killed them, had he lived. Victor’s body washes up.
Mike called his drug dealer and wanted some pills, despite a lack of cash. Susan saw Julie come home with a tattooed boy; she interrupted their kiss and questioned Julie about his piercings. Julie’s upset by Susan being upset. Orson learns baby Benjamin’s sleeping between him and Bree; he doesn’t want that, though Bree says it will help them all bond. Bree convinces Orson to give it a chance. Lynette’s calling around looking for her mom at bars. Tom thinks she’ll be fine but Lynette’s worried and won’t stop her calls. The police arrive to speak to Gabrielle. She says she hasn’t seen him in 2 days and explains she left her husband. The police reveal there were no prints on the boat. Who wiped it down? They are sure they’ll find out what happened. Gabrielle claims to be happy…
Susan comes home to find a note saying Julie’s out with her boyfriend. Mike’s drug dealer shows up to speak to Mike, but he’s gone; she’s happy to learn the man’s pre-med. Orson tells Bree he almost dozed off during work thanks to his sleepless nights. Bree thinks they’re still adjusting with the baby. Bree mentions she wishes she’d done it with Andrew, who didn’t turn out well. Orson says he’s sleeping in the den. Susan’s happy to meet with the pre-med guy, not knowing he’s a drug dealer. The dealer takes a call from a client. Susan shows off photos and other things about Julie’s beauty and smarts. She wants him to come back tomorrow. Bree drops off Andrew’s cellphone at Tom’s pizzeria and then asks him about how the baby issue complicated his sex life. Tom mentions all the places other than the bedroom Tom and Lynette had sex! Bree claims she, Orson, and the baby are a happy family, as Andrew looks on from nearby.
Mike’s replaced something at Adam’s sink. Adam answers his door to find a woman named Sylvia; he wants her to leave, as she ruined his life in Chicago. Mike watches. Sylvia says she’l come by another time. Adam says the woman’s an ex-patient with mental issues. Mike agrees to keep quiet . . . if he can get a prescription. Adam reminds him he has trouble prescribing pills for a man as a gynecologist.
Bree shows up at Orson’s office She posed as a patient to sex him up, and she drops her clothes. Lynette’s surprised to find her stepfather Glen at her home. They haven’t seen each other in years! They hug. Lynette’s mother called him and asked for money. They’re meeting at the park the next day and Lynette wants to join them. She broke into a car for a night. Adam stops by Orson’s office. He wants Orson to write a prescription and suggests it’s in return for hiding the truth about Danielle’s baby. Bree learns Andrew’s moving into his own place and says it’s because she sees him as a past mistake. He drives off.
Orson’s not happy to give Mike the prescription. Mike tells Orson he can’t take time off; Mike brings up the accident that Orson caused and Orson hands over the prescription. Mike comes to bed with Susan; she’s near sleep but mentions Barrett (the drug dealer), and the money he wants. Mike calls Barrett and tells him to stay away from his house. Edie leaves an anonymous tip claiming the mayor’s dead. Meanwhile, Carlos freaks out while Gabrielle’s calm. He’s going to go to the cops. She agrees to go, then drugs him with sleeping pills in his drink. Susan’s happy to see Barrett and Julie getting along. Mike comes home to learn all about this and privately gets mad at Barrett. Mike gives him his money and says he’s not to be around Julie. He threatens to tell Mike’s family about Mike’s drug habit. Mike finally admits Barrett’s a drug dealer and Susan wants him thrown out! Barrett leaves. Carlos is sleepy but wants to go. The police show up and question whether she was having an affair with Carlos. They don’t see Carlos in the background. The police learn that Victor’s been found alive and she agrees to go to the hospital. Gabrielle tells a sleeping Carlos that Victor’s alive, and they’re screwed!
Lynette and Glen arrive at the park. Glen suggests the end of his marriage was more complicated than Lynette thought. Susan’s told Julie about Mike having stopped taking pain pills, but Julie saw him picking up pills at the drug store. Glen gives Stella money, but her happiness fades when she seess Lynette. Lynette wants her to come home with her but she won’t drop her complaints about her childhood. Glen confesses he left Stella because he’s gay! Bree shows up at Andrew’s new place with a meal. She wants him home as the place is no good. She reminds him he put her through hell, but he points out he’s changed and she hasn’t noticed, or at least pointed it out. He thinks it’s time he had a new life. He says her leaving him on the side of the road saved his life, and he thanks her for it. She’s happy when he wants her to use a coaster! Lynette learns Glen’s partner passed away. Why didn’t Stella tell Glen? She was ashamed for “turning” Glen gay after 2 years of marriage, and Lynette thinks this helps explain all sorts of things about her childhood. Lynette wants Stella to come home with her but Stella doesn’t want to screw up their relationship again. Glen wants Stella to live with him in his guest room, as he’s been lonely before. She agrees but is keeping his money! Lynette’s happy.
Mike tells Susan he’s going out while she showers. He’s actually going out to take pills, which Susan sees from an upstairs window. Gabrielle and the police officers talk with Victor, who’s waking up. She just wants him to rest. Victor doesn’t remember anything about the boat and Gabrielle claims she doesn’t either. Victor’s neurologist thinks that’s not uncommon. Gabrielle shoos the detectives away and then agrees to stay with Victor a bit longer. He asks her to come close, then whispers in her ear he remembers everything, and will rest now as he’s going to need all his strength. Sylvia is still hanging out around Adam’s place, stalking him. Susan looks at the pill bottle and realizes Orson prescribed it for Mike.