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"Excited and Scared" is the 140th episode of Desperate Housewives.
Summary
As Halloween approaches, Susan is forced to reveal her secret, sexy internet side job to a shocked Mike, and Juanita becomes suspicious of Gabrielle's sudden interest in Grace. Meanwhile, Lynette becomes concerned about Tom's mother's memory lapses, and Bree learns a secret about Keith. Paul is encouraged to take wife Beth out on a date in order to light a spark in their unromantic relationship.
Plot
Previously on Desperate Housewives
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Bree's romance warmed up. Gaby grew closer to her biological daughter. Lynette finally got a nanny... but there was a catch. Susan added to her teaching income a secret job that made her vulnerable... to blackmail.
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| Mary Alice Young | ||
- Bree greets a naked Keith into her kitchen. ("Let Me Entertain You")
- Carlos yells at Gaby for buying Grace expensive gifts. Later, Gaby gives Grace a necklace from her jewelry box. ("The Thing That Counts is What's Inside")
- Lynette is forced to greet Tom's mother into her home. ("Let Me Entertain You")
- Susan is in lingerie in front of a computer screen and Paul Young is on the other side of the webcam, telling her that if she doesn't sell him her house, he will tell Mike of her internet career. ("Let Me Entertain You")
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Paul Young was a frustrated man. He'd been living with his wife for two months, yet she refused to sleep with him.
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We see Paul and Beth sitting in a waiting room as Paul angrily scratches the arm of his chair. He turns to Beth who does not reciprocate before his attention is moved forward again.
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He'd tried everything he could think of to put her in the mood... Expensive jewelry...
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In a series of minor flashbacks, Paul walks into his dining room and presents Beth with new jewelry.
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Second glasses of wine...
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Paul enters his dining room with a wine bottle in his hand and he pours some into Beth's glass.
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Instructional videos...
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Paul again enters his dining room and presents Beth with a DVD that she looks at with intrigue.
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But sadly, his wife's response was never what he'd hoped for.
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Beth slams the door in Paul's face after receiving the jewelry. Beth slams the door in Paul's face after receiving the wine. Beth slams ther door in Paul's face after receiving the video.
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So Paul decided to get help from someone sure to sympathize with his situation...
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The flashbacks cease and Paul is back in the office, waiting, as a man walks in and introduces himself as Dr. Gable.
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Another man.
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The Doctor asks if they should get the session started.
Later, the doctor is behind the desk with Paul and Beth on the opposite sides of it, Dr. Gable asks Beth if when she married Paul, she didn't expect for him to be released from prison, she confirms this. This causes him to ask if she was contempt to marry a man she could never truly be with, she confesses that she just wanted someone to care about her, "I wasn't really interested in all that... other stuff." she says. Dr. Gable asks her if by "stuff" she means "sex", Beth uncomfortably nods. "Do you not like sex?" he asks her, she tells him she isn't sure because she's a virgin. "Oh, come on!" Paul exclaims, Beth professes that it is true and that she was saving herself for marriage. "Good news," says Paul, "You are married, time to take the lid off the cookie jar." She asks him to stop calling it that, "Give me a cookie and I will." he tells her. Dr. Gable quiets them, saying that it is an unusual situation, and goes on, telling them that as they didn't get to know each other in any traditional sense, they should start dating. Paul is confused at this and the doctor tells him that he needs to give Beth a chance to know him so that she can develop normal, romantic feelings and then, in time, he's sure she'll want nothing more than to share his bed. Beth is glad to hear this and says to Paul, "I wouldn't mind going to some nice restaurants." He turns to her and merely says, "Fine." before getting up and leaving, Beth not far behind.
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Yes, Paul Young was frustrated, but even frustrated men...
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As they leave the therapist's office, Paul tells his wife, "FYI, until I get some action, it'll be dutch treat." Beth is taken aback.
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...have their pride.
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| Mary Alice Young | ||
Act I
We see a banner being put up on Wisteria Lane reading, "Happy Halloween" on top of a spooky fence with decorative cobwebs and spiders about it.
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It was that time of year when people find out... what they're afraid of...
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Tom emerges through the fence to fix some of the decorations. Renee walks by and Tom looks at her before she passes him by.
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For some, it's the monster in the bushes...
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Porter Scavo is walking down the street when someone in a mask jumps out at him from behind the bushes, startling him, Porter pushes him.
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For others, it's the spider in their hair...
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Lee is putting a "SOLD" sign on a "For Sale" sign and someone dangles a spider on a string next top his face, causing him to scream in terror before finding out the culprit is Penny Scavo.
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For a few, it's the vampire in the driveway...
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Celia Solis and a friend are walking down the sidewalk when Carlos jumps out at them from his driveway with fake vampire teeth in, they scream and run away.
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Yes, Halloween had once again come to Wisteria Lane ...
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Renee continues to walk down the street holding papers in her hand as the masked person from before jumps out at her, she merely stares at him and carries on walking into Lynette's house.
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And the only thought that frightened one woman was that she might not be the center of attention.
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| Mary Alice Young | ||
Renee walks into Lynette's house saying that she's having a party and they all have to come. Lynette, Bree and Gaby simply stare at her and the former asks if she knocked. Renee goes onto say as she walks round to them that Doug and her had Halloween parties every year in New York and she doesn't see why she shouldn't carry on that tradition, "...even though the food's not as good and the company is far less interesting." she says. "Well, who could turn down in invitation like that?" Bree asks sarcastically, Renee hands out the invites and Gaby tells them that Grace is sleeping over that night but she could stop by when they go trick-or-treating to show them the girls costumes. She says that Juanita's going as a puppy this year and is going to look so cute. Renee points to a symbol of a tricycle with a line through it on the invites and Gaby asks her what it means, Renee explains that it means no kids allowed at the party. Bree says that she'll attend if she can bring Keith, Renee says that she supposes one child will be okay. Allison Scavo enters the room, apologizing for interrupting, and asks Lynette if she bought her her hand cream, Lynette says that she doesn't remember being asked to but she can go after she's done eating. Allison says that's alright, "It's just that my hands are so dry they're beginning to crack and bleed." Lynette concedes, saying she'll go now and that she'll see everybody later, she stands up and tells Allison to make sure that Paige wakes up at 3:00 because if she's asleep any longer she'll be up all night, Allison agrees to it and Lynette leaves the house. Allison sees the invitations and yells, "Ooh a party." in glee, Renee simply says, "No." and rips the invitation out of her hand before walking away.
We see a close-up of a pumpkin-shaped trick-or-treating bucket over at Susan's apartment and the shot moves up to Susan standing behind Mike who is looking angrily at a laptop, having just found out about Susan's work at Va-Va-Va-Broom.com, Susan assures him that as websites go, it's not that popular (just in Asia and parts of Europe). She points out that there's no nudity, she was just cleaning in her underwear, "Oh look, Mike, I know you must be angry, if you want to yell, yell, let me have it... Say something, please." she says to him after he doesn't respond. He tells her that he should have taken that job in Alaska, Susan is confused, Mike, standing up, goes on to say that if he had done a better job taking care of his family then she wouldn't have had to resort to what she did. Susan tries to assure him that it was not his fault but her stupid mistake as she thought no one would know, she tearfully apologizes. "Why did you decide to tell me?" Mike asks, "Did somebody see you?" Susan pauses for a moment before spitting out, "Paul Young." Mike is annoyed, "And he's sort of blackmailing me." Susan says. Mike is now shocked, "He says that if we don't sell him our house, he's gonna tell you." she informs him. Mike stares for a second and walks over to his tools, Susan asks what he is doing as he reaches for a hammer, "What do you think?" he asks, Susan stops him, trying to convince him that Paul did them a favor as she isn't lying to him now. Mike walks past her, getting closer to the door and Susan jumps on his back with her arms around his neck telling him that they're closer than ever. He asks her to get off of him but she tells him that violence isn't the answer, Mike says that they cannot let Paul get away with this and Susan assures him that they won't, "I have an idea how to get him to back off." she tells Mike. "I'm listening." he tells her.
Over at the Sanchez home, we see a close-up of another pumpkin-shaped trick-or-treating bucket and Grace grabs it from the shelf, saying that she cannot wait to go trick-or-treating with Juanita and that the pumpkin-bucket is what she will use to hold all of her candy. Juanita, who is sitting in a chair in Grace's bedroom, tells Grace that that won't cut it in her neighborhood as in the previous year, she filled up two pillowcases. Grace is impressed and Juanita opens Grace's jewelry box to find her mother's necklace in there, she slowly pulls it out and asks Grace where she got it, "Why?" Grace asks, Juanita tells her that it is her mom's, Grace pulls the necklace from Juanita's hand, telling her that it was a gift from her aunt. She places it into one of her drawers, "Oh, okay." Juanita says disbelievingly. Carmen stands at the door and alerts the girls that Mr. Solis is there, Juanita and Grace run out of the room, following Carmen downstairs. Juanita makes sure Grace has gone and stops, she turns around and smiles making her way back to the drawer.
Juanita steps into her mother's car and Gaby asks if she and Grace had a good time, Juanita tells her it was okay, as she buckles her seatbelt. "What are you smiling about?" Gaby asks, intrigued, "I found out something about Grace today." says Juanita, "She's a thief." She shows her mother the necklace in her hand. Gaby is shocked and asks Juanita what she is doing with that, Juanita says that Grace stole her necklace so she stole it back. "No, no, no!" cries Gaby as she takes the necklace from Juanita's hand, Juanita is confused at her mother's reaction. Gaby tells Juanita that it is very sweet of her but Grace didn't steal the necklace, she, herself, gave it to Grace as a present. Juanita wonders why and Gaby tells her that she felt sorry for her as her family is poor and the Solises are rich. Juanita points out that their Aunt Rosie is rich and Gaby always hides her jewelry box when ever she comes over, "Yes, well, Grace isn't a klepto with a meth habit." Gaby tells her. Juanita asks if she should put it back but Gaby tells her not to, saying that she will take care of it. "Now that I know you're good at getting things back, next time we're at Aunt Rosie's, I'm missing gold earrings." she says before starting the car and driving away.
We see a close-up of a Jack O' Lantern at the Scavo house and the shot goes up to reveal Lynette walking through the door, she sees Allison knitting in a chair and tells her that she got the hand cream and passes it to her, Allison thanks her, saying that she just used her last jar. Lynette asks how it went with the baby, before asking, "Where is the baby?" Allison tells her that she's upstairs in her crib, Lynette is shocked at this, "What, she's still asleep?!" she cries, Allison says, "Yes! Bless her heart, I had time to mend all of Rodney's old sweaters." Lynette assures her that she means Tom, not Rodney, "And I asked you and you said that you would wake her at three." says Lynette. "That's ridiculous," Allison tells her, "I would never agree to wake a sleeping baby." Lynette checks her watch and makes her way to the stairs, noting that Paige has been down for almost four hours and will be up all night, she starts to walk up the stairs as Allison stands up, angry, "Would you stop yelling at me?!" she exclaims, Lynette assures her that she isn't yelling at her, Allison says, "Yes you are, you're angry and you're saying it's my fault! You're a liar!" Allison walks away and Lynette is stunned at her mother-in-law.
Paul opens his door to Susan who is holding a basket of muffins, he awkwardly greets her and wonders why she has a muffin-basket. Susan tells him that it's a peace offering. "For what?" Paul asks, confused. Susan says that they need to move past the past. Susan walks into the house and tells Paul that he has been a really good tenant and she appreciates that he never complains, he's never late with the rent check, and is usually early. Susan places the muffin-basket on the kitchen counter as Paul walks to the opposite side of it. She starts to say how lucky they are but it turns into an "Oh dear." Paul is confused and Susan asks if that is a thumbtack on the wall. She goes over to inspect it. "Well, I tried willing the calendar to stay up but it just wouldn't co-operate." Paul tells her, "Oh, but Paul, that is a clear violation of your lease agreement which I happen to have..." Susan goes back to the basket and pulls some papers from it, "Right here." she tells him. She decreases the paper and points out that on page two it states that there are to be no alterations. "So, it appears you have sixty days to vacate the premise, but, good news, I think you'll be getting most of your deposit back, I'll just need to deduct the cost of repairing the thumb-tack hole." Paul tells her that she's very clever but asks her if she really thinks she's in a position to be making such demands. He tells her that they can overlook this or he can call her husband and tell him of her little cleaning fetish. "He knows, Paul. I told him everything including the part where you tried to blackmail me. He wasn't happy." Paul's smile turns to a frown and Susan pulls the hammer from earlier, from the basket, telling him that she had to pry it out of his hand so that Paul wouldn't need a paramedic to pry it out of his skull. "Allow me to demonstrate." she tells him, pulling a muffin from the basket and placing it on the counter, "This is you." she says, she then slams the hammer down onto the muffin, decimating it. "This is you if you tell anyone and Mike finds out." Paul tells her that he understands and Susan hands him back the papers, "Don't forget, sixty days." she says, grinning heavily. She makes her way over to the door and opens it, "Oh, and enjoy those raisin muffins, at least, I hope they're all raisins, my apartment has rats." She leaves and closes the door behind her.
Act II
Keith and Bree are walking through the halls of an apartment building and Keith says that he cannot believe Bree is finally going to see his apartment, Bree says that she can't either but, as he said, they have to get to know each other better, "So... here goes." she says once they reach Keith's door. Keith puts his key in the lock and soon opens the door to a well-furnished, tasteful apartment. Bree is shocked at how good it looks, "You have to understand, I had this whole frozen smile ready, I was expecting a bachelor pad. You know, pizza boxes, dirty underwear, a neon beer clock, but look at this place, it's tastefully decorated and smells... oh my, is that potpourri?" She asks after sniffing the air, Keith tells her that he just switched to the Autumn blend, "Take me, right now, on that table." Bree says, Keith asks if he should use a placemat before he kisses Bree, he begins to kiss her neck giving Bree the view of the woman entering the room, she is shocked and pulls Keith off of her, he says that that is Mimi, his roommate. "See ya." she says as she walks back from the kitchen and out of the room. Bree puts a large grin on her face, "Well, it looks like that frozen smile came in handy after all."
We see the exterior of a spookily decorated house with a skull puffing smoke of a sign that says, "Oakridge School Haunted House" with various screams and sound effects going on. The shot moves down to Paul and Beth. Beth says that Paul does keep her on her toes, saying that they're in an unexpected spot for their first date. "Well, I know it sounds corny, but, you take a girl to a haunted house, she'll probably want to grab on to you." Paul tells her, Beth smiles at him and he points out that the pumpkin bread looks pretty good and asks her to go and get him a couple of slices, Beth agrees and walks away. Paul walks up to the first school mom he sees and asks her if she's an Oakridge parent, she admits to it and asks him if he's thinking of sending his child there, "I don't think so, my family values are quite traditional." he says, the mom is confused, Paul continues, "I happen to have some information about the after-school activities of one of the teachers and, let's just say, it was troubling." The mom asks what kind of information he has and Paul asks her if she is familiar to a Mrs. Delfino.
It is night time over at 4355 Wisteria Lane and Lynette is cradling a crying Paige in her arms, looking extremely tired and chanting for the baby to go to sleep. She sees a jar of Allison's hand cream and picks it up, she walks with Paige over to the bathroom and opens Allison's bag to discover ten full jars of hand cream which she had when she said she had run out, Lynette is confused, puts the jar she is holding in the bag and walks out of the room.
Lynette walks into her bedroom and turn the lamp on which wakes Tom immediately, she sits on his bedside and he asks her if she's okay and what the time is, she says it's 4:12 in the morning and goes on to say that she is worried about his mom as she doesn't think she's "all there." "You woke me up at four AM to bitch about my mom? You couldn't do that during business hours?" Tom asks before trying to turn to sleep again, "No, listen," says Lynette, "She sent me out to buy hand cream when she already had ten jars, she forgot to wake up the baby." Tom says that his mother is old and therefore forgets some things. Lynette climbs over him to sit on her side of the bed, telling him that she also has these intense mood swings, "I mean, today, she almost took my head off, for no reason." Lynette tells him, "And then she looked like she was gonna burst into tears." Tom assures her that it's merely because she's away from home and isn't used to all of the chaos. Lynette says she gets it, she's Tom's mom and he loves her and can look for an excuse for every one of these things but she thinks there's more going on here than just Allison being a little forgetful. She gets into bed and lays down, she taps Tom's arm and tells him that his light's on, he seems annoyed and worried.
The next morning, Allison is sitting at the kitchen table as Tom comes down the stairs, ready for work, he slows down as he approaches his mother who is doing the crossword in the newspaper and he walks over to her, greeting her. He stands behind her and asks her how she's doing, she says she's fine but asks why he would ask if something is wrong. Tom sits down in the adjacent chair to her but turns to face her, he tells Allison that she seems a little scattered lately, "Have you noticed that?" he asks, she smacks his arm lovingly, "There's my little worry wart." she says, "Remember when you were at Camp Kickaboo? You were sure Hurricane Belle had killed us all even though it was off the coast of Georgia." Lynette enters the room behind them, unnoticed. "And that mean counselor, Bob, wouldn't let me call you." Lynette continues doing kitchen work, listening in on the conversation, "His name was Andy." says Allison, Tom is shocked she remembers and Allison reminds him that he did call and even made her put the dog on the phone, "Which you did." says Tom. Allison tells him that she didn't. She just barked a couple of times. She makes some barking noises and her and Tom laugh with each other. She says she better go and get dressed because she told Penny that she'd help her with her costume. Allison gets up and leaves the room. Tom stands up and points out to Lynette that she is remembering things that he doesn't even remember. Lynette reveals that she's been doing a little research and discovered something called "Sundowning" where a lot of people with dementia don't show signs in the day, it's only at night that they get confused. "Did you not just hear her? My mother is not senile. Let's be honest. You've been trying to get her out of this house ever since she walked in." Lynette is shocked that he thinks it's a tactic and informs him that the other day, she made tea and left the stove on for an hour and that there has been a lot of stuff like that and she's starting to get worried. Lynette suggests that they take her to the doctor. Tom angrily refuses and Lynette tries to tell him that until they know what is going on, she doesn't feel comfortable with her watching the baby. "There is nothing wrong with my mother, okay?! So just drop it!" He is very angry and walks away.
Act III
Bree walks out from a hall in Keith's apartment, she sees Mimi making coffee and Mimi greets her, she asks her if she wants something to eat or some tea. Bree says that tea would be lovely. "How do you take it?" asks Mimi. "With and explanation," Bree tells her. Mimi is confused and Bree goes on to say that Keith didn't tell her that he had a female roommate. "And yes, he said that you two never slept together well, except for those two times." Bree says, Mimi is shocked, saying that they never had sex. Bree reveals that that was her way of making sure, Mimi commends her and Bree thanks her. "By the way, you don't have to worry about other women, the guy never stops talking about you," Mimi tells her. Bree says that that's good to hear. Mimi says she's going to go and take a shower and gives Bree her tea. She asks her to run Keith's mail to him and Bree agrees. Mimi leaves and Bree stirs her tea. She picks up Keith's mail, rifles through it, and sees a letter from the department of corrections. She drops the other mail and stares intently at this one.
Bree walks over to 4362 Wisteria Lane and sees Renee setting up the decorations for her Halloween party. Renee asks her what's up and Bree says that she needs to ask her something, "In the time that you and Keith spent together, did you ever have a sense that he might be-" Bree is cut off, "Into boney old white ladies? Definitely." Bree asks if Renee ever got the vibe that he was a little crazy, "Ugh, well, let me think, our first date was cut short when you sabotaged your own sprinkler system, our second was derailed when you terrorized me with a little person, no, I think the vibe I picked up is you're crazy." Renee tells Bree. Bree tells her that she isn't being very helpful and Renee asks what this is really about. Bree says that she wants to find out if he's dangerous because she recently discovered that he is on probation for assault. "Oh, that?" says Renee, Bree is shocked that Renee knows about it and Renee goes on to say that it happened at the bar where she met him about a year ago, he brought his girlfriend there, some guy started hitting on her, so Keith flattened him." Bree is surprised that Keith told her that but Renee corrects her in saying that the bartender did. "I always check out the guys before I bring them home, don't wanna end up handcuffed to my bed for three days... again." Bree is relieved to learn that Keith was merely defending his girlfriend and tells Renee that it's nice to know that chivalry isn't dead. "But there is another way to find out if he's violent." says Renee, Bree is intrigued, "Well start a fight with him, if he slugs you he's violent." Bree is shocked and leans in to Renee, she says, "Whoever had you handcuffed to the bed for three days, he has my respect." Renee blows Bree a kiss and Bree walks away.
Gaby is going through her sewing kit and yells to Grace, who is in the other room, that this is the first time she's made a costume so if she hates it, just tell her. "I love it, I've never had such a pretty costume before, thank you." calls Grace as Gaby packs away her sewing kit. "You're the coolest mom ever." she calls. Gaby is touched. Juanita runs into the room dressed in a puppy costume and barks for her mother. Gaby tells Juanita that she is adorable. Grace opens the doors to the wardrobe and emerges in her princess costume. Gaby's attention is suddenly switched from Juanita to Grace, "Oh Grace, you look beautiful." she says, "Like a real princess." Grace says that she feels like one, Gaby walks Grace over to the bed, asking her what every princess needs. Juanita says that she can also wag her tail and she turns around and does so, Gaby stops her, telling her to hold on, and pulls out a tiara for Grace. She tells her that once she puts it on she will style her hair around it. Juanita asks if Gaby can style her hair. "But sweetie, it doesn't even show, but I am going to go over you with a lint roller." Juanita seems upset and jumps on the bed saying that she wants to be a princess. Gaby is adjusting Grace's tiara and says that all Juanita has talked about for the last four months is how much she wants to go as a dog. Juanita says she changed her mind but Gaby replies, "Well I'm sorry, you're either going as a dog or a little Mexican girl, and in this neighborhood, we both know who's getting more candy." She tells Grace that they are going to the mirror and the two of them walk to the bathroom, leaving Juanita annoyed.
Susan is teaching her class dressed as a rag doll with a black wig in bunches and a pink dress with an apron. She is telling her students that they can make their Jack O' Lanterns have any face they want when a staff member enters to tell Susan that Principal Hobson would like to see her and he seems upset about something. Susan seems sad and confused at this scrap of news and the staff member leaves.
Over at their apartment, Mike is reading the paper and MJ, who is dressed as a caveman, is whacking his caveman's club against the counter. Susan walks through the door, still in rag doll dress, and Mike tells her, "There you are, your son's been waiting four millions years to go trick-or-treating." MJ says, "Me want candy, ug." Susan is holding a large box under her arm and tells MJ to go and get ready and he'll go. MJ leaves and Mike takes the box out of her arm and asks her what it's for, Susan is silent and he asks her if she's okay as he places the box on the counter, "I got fired." Susan tells him. Mike is shocked, "They found out about the website." Susan tells him, Mike sighs and comes to an immediate revelation that Paul was behind it. he says that, this time, he's going to kill him and Susan won't stop him. Susan stops him and assures him that it wasn't Paul and that one of the moms called the school. Mike is confused and Susan assumes that she caught her husband watching it or something. Susan walks over to a chair and sits down, as does Mike, and Mike asks her what they are going to do as his money alone won't support them, Susan says that she'll find another job but Mike doubts it. He picks up his cell phone from the counter behind him and Susan asks him what he's doing, he dials and tells her he's calling about that job in Alaska, Susan refuses to let him as he'd be gone three months and cannot do that to MJ, "Do what?!" cries Mike, "Make an honest living?! How much thought did you give MJ when you were dancing around in your underwear?" Susan begs him not to say that and Mike gets up, he tells Susan that now that one of the school moms knows, MJ will probably find out. "No, Susan, you don't get to make the decisions about what's best for this family anymore. I do!" He tells her to take MJ trick-or-treating and he will make the phone call. He leaves the room and Susan sits there, shamefully.
Paul and Beth walk into 4353 Wisteria Lane after having dated and Beth says that she had a lovely time at dinner and tells him that it's nice to hear all those stories about his childhood and Paul tells her that it was nice telling them as he likes remembering happy days. "Can I give you an odd compliment?" Beth asks, "When you talk about the past, it changes how you look, you're a lot less... intimidating." she tells him. Paul says that that is an odd compliment but he appreciates it. He leans in to kiss her but Beth is shocked and asks him what he is doing. He says he was responding to what he thought was a signal from her. Beth assures him that it wasn't a signal for him to try and jam his tongue down her throat. "Beth, I'm not some kind of animal trying to satisfy its' urges, if I were I could have gone to any bar or any street corner weeks ago." Beth asks him what he wants and Paul tells her that he wants to connect with her so that the two of them can have a real marriage and sex is part of that. But there's more. Paul takes her hand, "With what I've been through, I need a partner by my side, someone I can trust." he tells her, "I think you can be that person. The question is, do you?" Paul grabs Beth and kisses her passionately but she pushes him off and slaps him across the face, "I want you gone by the end of the week." Paul tells her after rubbing his cheek. Beth is shocked and Paul vacates up the stairs.
Act IV
A group of children in costume run up Wisteria Lane at night time, it is Halloween and Carlos, dressed as a cowboy, is handing candy out to kids outside of his house. Over at the Scavo house, Penny opens the door to kids and Allison comes over, dressed with fairy wings, to hand out the candy. Over at 4362 Wisteria Lane, Renee's Halloween party has begun and the doorbell rings. Renee is dressed as Marilyn Monroe and answers the door to Bree, a cheerleader, and Keith, one of Hell's Angels. Bree says that she loves Renee's costume and Keith asks who she is meant to be, "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday Mr. President." Renee sings, "Michelle Obama, cool." Keith says before walking away. Renee says that he has clearly come as one of Hell's Idiots. Bree goes to join him.
Allison notes that they're going to run out of candy and she had better go to the store. Tom tells her that she doesn't because they have loads of back-up candy in the cupboard and he always keeps a stash in his golf bag. "You and your sweet tooth." Allison tells him. Tom walks away and the doorbell rings, Allison goes over to answer it. Outside of the house, Gaby has Grace, Juanita and Celia (who is contrasting Juanita by sporting a cat costume), Gaby tells Celia to stop mooing because she's a cat. Allison answers the door and Grace, Juanita and Celia all yell, "Trick-or-treat!" Allison notes how precious they look as Penny emerges with the candy. Gaby asks if she's Tom's mother and introduces herself as Gaby, saying that they met the other day. "Of course," says Allison, "And this must be your pretty little princess, you're as beautiful as your mommy aren't you," Allison says to Grace. Gaby corrects Allison by saying her daughter is the dog and Juanita stares angrily at her mother. Gaby grabs a handful of candy and throws it into Juanita's pillow case. "It's cheaper than therapy," she says before walking away with her children. Allison and Penny go back inside, Allison takes a look in the bag, "Oh dear," she says, "We're running out of candy, I better take a little trip down to the store." She grabs her purse but Penny tells her that they have more somewhere, "Don't you worry, grandma's gonna take care of it." Allison tells Penny before she leaves the house. Penny is confused with her grandmother.
Back over at Renee's party, there is another ring of the doorbell and Renee opens it to Lee who is also dressed as Marilyn Monroe and begins to sing "Happy Birthday." They stare at each other in the same costume and Lee angrily walks away after saying, "Son of a bitch."
Bree is getting food and a man dressed as a footballer begins to talk to her in role-play. He thanks her for cheering for him at the big day and she says it was her pleasure. "Go team!" she says, thrusting her pom-poms. He asks her if, because he scored the winning touchdown, he gets a kiss or something, Bree says that she's already going to the prom with someone else. "So? He doesn't have to know." says the football player. "Come on, one kiss." he kisses the air and moves towards her. "Alright, our little skit is over." Bree tells him but he says that she isn't getting rid of him that easily. He advances some more and Bree calls for Keith. His attention is turned and he makes his way over to his girlfriend. He mentions that Bree, the cheerleader, looks great with the football guy and Bree mentions that she was just asking him to leave her alone but he doesn't quite seem to get the message. "That true? You bothering her?" says Keith, slightly more seriously. The football man professes that he wasn't as it was just a costume thing and they were fooling around. The man leaves and Bree smiles before thanking Keith for what he did saying that it was gallant and sexy. She gives him a little kiss and Bree turns away to the food, as she starts to say that no one has ever defended her like that before, Keith leaves to the football guy. Bree is talking about how Orson once threw half a diet soda at a man whilst they were in a moving vehicle when she turns around and notices Keith is now talking to the football guy. She walks up to them as the man professes they were just fooling around but Keith tells him that he has to apologize to his girlfriend. The guy apologized and Bree accepts it, asking Keith to leave with her. "Just a second," he says, "Try that again and this time mean it." The guy asks what Keith will do before Keith bats him and lifts him by his collar. Bree tells him to stop and Keith lets go. He gets a worried expression on his face, looks at Bree, and leaves. Bree follows him out into the front garden. She asks what happened in there and Keith replies, "An idiot was pushing my buttons and I went off, wasn't it obvious?!" She asks why he's yelling at her. "Because, it's who I am!" he yells. "I've been arrested for this before! You know, I kept trying to convince myself that it wasn't a problem until the second time I got arrested, then I realized, it was! So, feel free, to break up with me, because you know you want to." Bree tells him that she doesn't want to break up with him, "Come on," he says, "You can't be with a guy like me with your controlled smile and your perfect house and your perfect lawn!" Bree responds, "You wanna talk about my perfect lawn?! Nine years ago my son found me face-up drunk on it!" Keith is shocked, "It's true!" Bree yells, "He had to turn the sprinklers on to wake me up! (see "Thank You So Much") Did you not know you were dating the biggest lush in Fairview?!" Keith, stunned, says that he didn't, "We all have baggage," Bree says, "And you and I have reached that point where we get to see what the other one has been carrying around all these years. Anything else you've been hiding?" Keith tells her that she has just pretty much seen him at his worst, "Well I don't think I've seen anything that I can't handle. How about you? You think you can deal with a control freak with a drinking problem?" Keith walks up to her and kisses her, causing her to drop her pom-poms.
Parker, Porter and Tom are all watching a scary movie and squirming at it all the same, the boys ask for snacks and Tom calls for his mom, however, Penny tells him that she's not back yet, Tom asks from where and Penny tells him that she went to the store to buy more candy. Tom is confused and tells the boys to listen out for the baby and he'll be back as soon as he can. Tom gets up and Parker asks if Allison is okay, Tom says that it's just a little late for her to be out all by herself and he'll be right back.
Tom goes out onto Wisteria Lane amongst all of the people moving about in costume and he begins to move through the crowd. He moves forward but we see that Allison is sitting by herself on the floor next to someone's house and she is looking extremely confused and frightened.
Act V
Juanita and Grace are over at the Solis home and are emptying their pillowcases to make a huge pile of candy, Grace is shocked at how much they collected and Gaby, who is helping with Celia's costume, tells Grace that she deserves every piece because she worked that sidewalk like a Milan runway. Gaby asks Celia how she got so much gum in her fur as she snips it out. Grace runs up to Gaby with a piece of candy and gives it to her, saying she knows she likes peppermint. Gaby is touched and tells Grace that she's very thoughtful and gives her a hug. Juanita is angry at seeing this and Gaby tells Grace, "I've gotta give Celia a bath, you two go easy on the candy." Grace goes to lift the tiara, "Oh, gosh," she says, "I can't get this out of my hair." Grace calls for Gaby but Juanita gets up, telling her it's okay, and they don't need Gaby. She takes the scissors from the table and says, "I'll take care of it." snipping the blades.
Gaby is cleaning the make-up from Celia's face and asks her, one more time, what noise a cat makes, "Oink?" Celia says, "Boy, I really hope you marry well." Gaby tells her. There is a loud scream from downstairs and Gaby runs down to the living room, she gasps at what she sees. Juanita holding scissors and a tiara with a large section of Grace's her, Grace is shocked, "She was having a problem, I fixed it." Juanita says. Gaby gasps.
Lynette and Lee are leaving 4362 Wisteria Lane and Lynette is dressed as a pin-up model in a short, brown wig with a red gown and pearls, telling Lee that he is a much better Marilyn than Renee is. She then gets a phone call and gets her cell. She greets Carlos on the other line, "What's up, oh, okay, I wil-, I will be right there." she says, panicked. She hands the phone to Lee and runs away.
Lynette runs up the porch of 4349 Wisteria Lane to see Carlos waiting there, he points to Allison who is sitting on a chair on the porch and heads inside. Lynette goes over to her mother-in-law and gently places her hand on her shoulder. Allison is shocked and Lynette tries to calm her down. After realizing who it is, a frightened Allison hugs Lynette as the two of them stand up, Lynette tells her that it'll be alright and Allison says, "I was walking. I must have got turned around. I made it up Claire Graham's house but the lights were out." Lynette tells her that there is no Claire Graham on this street. "Oh, there most certainly is, she lives..." Allison gets confused. Lynette puts her arm around Allison and says that they should go home, "You let go of me!" Allison yells as Tom walks up to this, seeing it, "You're doing this to me, you're making me feel crazy!" Allison tells Lynette, Lynette tries to hold Allison's hands but Allison yells, "I said let go!" and slaps Lynette right across the face. Lynette screams and clutches her cheek in pain, Allison herself is shocked at what she did and frantically apologizes. Tom is still watching. "I don't know where my head is I've never done that before." says Allison before bursting into tears. Lynette and Allison turn to Tom and Allison makes her way towards her son, "It's okay mom, I'm here." he says.
Over at 4353 Wisteria Lane, Beth in on the phone to her mother, telling her that Paul wants her gone. She professes that she's been trying to make it work and does everything he asks her. She suggests coming home because, although she made a commitment, she is so unhappy. She tells her mother that she wants her to be proud of her and eventually concedes to staying with Paul. She hangs up the phone.
Rag doll Susan is walking down Wisteria Lane with cave-man MJ. Lee makes his way towards her in his high-heels, saying that he needs to talk to her, Susan asks what's up, "Paul Young wanted me to ask again if you had any interest in selling your place?" he asks her. Susan refuses, saying that Paul will be vacating her house in sixty days, Lee says that he was asked to check again as Susan's circumstances had recently changed. Susan asks when Paul said that and Lee tells her, "This morning." Susan looks over at her house and sees Paul handing candy out to young children. She hands Lee MJ's trick-or-treating bucket and asks him to take MJ to Mrs. McCluskey's and Lee agrees. Susan takes MJ's cave-man club from him saying, "Mommy's gonna borrow this." She makes her way to Paul.
Paul opens the door to Susan and immediately she yells, "You bastard!" and pushes him backwards, causing her to walk into the house. She slams the door behind her and swings her cave-man club, smashing a vase. Paul steps back, startled, and wonders what the hell she is doing. "When you moved here I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt!" she yells, she lifts her club and tries to hit him with it but he quickly ducks out of the way leaving her to smash a light above the kitchen counter, causing it to explode a little. "But you're evil!" Susan swings the club at him again but he jumps backwards leaving her to rid a table of what was on it. She keeps on swinging it, smashing items in her house and Paul ends up lying on the floor, frantically moving backwards, "But guess what?! The benefit of the doubt is over!" She kicks a cupboard door shut, giving her a clear shot at him. The doorbell rings and we hear, "Trick or treat!" through the door, Susan slams the bat down on the counter, smashing Paul's bowl full of candy and she yells to the children, "He's out of candy!" Paul crawls backwards along the floor, wanting her to stop, but she merely advances, raising the bat, "You know what?!" she says, "I glad I didn't let Mike do this, because I'm really enjoying it!" She lifts the club, ready to hit Paul when she hears, "Get away from him!" Susan looks at the stairs to see Beth pointing a gun at her. "Beth, you don't know what he's done." Susan says. Beth tells her that she doesn't care. She walks closer with the gun, "He's my husband." she says, "Now get out of this house." Beth disengages the safety on the gun and Susan stares at her and then Paul, who is still on the floor. She lowers the club, slams it onto the floor and makes her way to the door. She opens the door and leaves. Paul stands up and thanks Beth who lowers the gun, asking him if he's okay, he says he is and he thanks his wife. Paul and Beth make out passionately.
Act VI
Juanita is sitting in Gaby's bedroom and Gaby walks in saying that Mrs. Sanchez was furious about Grace's hair but fortunately Grace said it was her idea. Juanita says, "Of course she did." Gaby tells Juanita, "Thank God, otherwise she wouldn't be able to come here and play anymore." Juanita snaps and asks who cares. Gaby is confused, thinking that Grace is Juanita's friend. But Juanita points out that she didn't even know Grace until a month ago. Gaby points out that Juanita loves spending time with her but Juanita replies, "No, you do! You're always talking to her, kissing her, staring at her, you like her better than me!" Gaby tells Juanita that that's ridiculous and so Juanita asks why Gaby gave Grace her necklace when she cannot even touch her jewelry. We see Carlos stand at the doorframe. "What's so special about Grace?!" yells Jaunita. Gaby is silent at this and Juanita walks away, angry. Gaby stands up and sees Carlos. He tells her that this is bad; Juanita knows something is up and he thinks that they should pull back and stay away from Grace for a while. Gaby refuses, saying that she'll just be more careful and it'll be fine, Gaby tries to leave but Carlos says that they have to protect their daughter. "They're both our daughters." Gaby tells him before leaving.
Susan is helping Mike pack, saying that she really doesn't want him to go, he says that he doesn't want to go either but going to Alaska will give them enough money to get Paul out of their house and give them their lives back. "Plus," he says, "If I stay, I'm afraid I'll kill him." Susan stares at her husband pack.
Tom walks up the porch of his house and tells his mother, who is sitting there, that the car's all loaded and it's time to go. Allison points out that it's to a nursing home and she doesn't seem happy about it. Tom assures her that it isn't a nursing home, it's assisted living and it's a beautiful facility. "Just tell me this, Tommy, after I go there when do I get to leave? When do I get to go home?" she asks. Tom tells her that they'll have to see what the doctors say. "Never, that's when," Allison says, "I've seen my friends go into these places and they don't come out again." Tom walks over to her and sits between her and a silent Lynette. He says that he talked to his siblings and they all agree that she can't live by herself anymore. "If something bad were to happen to you, we would never forgive ourselves." he tells her, "The only thing bad happening here is what you are doing to me!" Allison exclaims. Tom tells her that he doesn't know what else to do and Allison turns to him, she says, "When you called me at that camp, and you were scared, you kept saying, 'I wanna come home, mom' and I said 'Tommy, if you mean that, I'll come get you'. That's what you do." Allison stands up and Tom and Lynette watch as she walks down the porch, to the car. Lynette turns to Tom and sees how sad he looks, she puts her hand on his arm and he briefly looks at her before sighing.
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The time comes where we all must find out what we're afraid of... Some of us fear she may never forgive me...
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We see a Jack O' Lantern on the street as Tom walks down the porch and sees his mother about to leave.
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Other's worry she might learn the truth...
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Gaby watches Juanita from afar as Juanita eats some of her Halloween candy.
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A few wonder, 'Could he send me away?'...
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Beth watches Paul drink his coffee.
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Yes, the world is a scary place. It's even more terrifying if we have to face it...
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Susan is standing behind MJ who is saying good bye to his father, Mike stands up and makes his way to the door with his suitcase, him and Susan exchange a look and he leaves the apartment for Alaska.
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...alone
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| Mary Alice Young | ||
Reception
On its original broadcast on ABC, the episode scored 11.096 million of viewers and achieved a 3.5 rating in the adults 18-49 demographic. With the DVR Rating, this episode is up 2.2 in million of viewers (rising to a total of 13.3 million of viewers) and it's up 1.1 in the adults 18-49 demographic (rising to a total of a 4.6 rating).
Trivia
- This is the second episode of Desperate Housewives to have a Halloween theme. The first was "Now I Know, Don't Be Scared", in season 4.
- Kathryn Joosten (Karen McCluskey) and Tuc Watkins (Bob Hunter) do not appear and are not credited in this episode.
- The title of this episode comes from lyrics to the Broadway musical number "I Know Things Now", taken from Stephen Sondheim's Into the Woods.
- When talking to his mother, Tom reveals that he has two siblings, Peter and Theresa Scavo.
- During her dialogue with Gabrielle, Juanita reveals that the Solises have an aunt named Rosie.
Gallery
Gallery of photographic stills released to promote the episode.
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