Sister Mary Bernard: Money can't buy happiness.
Gabrielle Solis: Sure it can! That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep them from rioting.

I've never seen so many sweater sets — are you sure this is a closet and not a portal to the 1950s?

—Renee Perry

I think i've got the right tree. Just sick of barking.

—Katherine Mayfair

It's true, she has a little room with magazines and an aquarium.

—Susan Delfino

It's in the detonator.

—Angie Bolen